Meeting #3104 Feb 6, 1997 PDF Print E-mail

President: Christian McGuire
Substitute Scribe: Phil Castora

[Dedicated to the proposition that all LASFS members are created silly.]

President Christian McGuire didn't gavel the meeting to order at 8:20, on account of because once again we were suffering from a dearth of gavels, which sounds a little like it ought to be the title of a best-selling novel, but isn't. If you can make anything out of it, be sure to keep it to yourself.

We were also suffering from a dearth of Scribe, so Phil Castora allowed myself to be dragooned into pretending to pay attention, and make some chicken scratches that I would then have to transcribe into legible remarks before I forgot what the hell they meant, and then discover they didn't mean anything.

Of course, as soon as he had determind the meeting had been called to order, Rob Cole moved to adjourn, followed by other members moving to table and perform other weird and perverty parliamentary procedures. Moving right along, President Christian properly ignored this nonsense -- properly?!? And we even re-elected him! Well, nobody's perfect, I suppose.

Since duly-elected Scribe Beth O'Brien hadn't mailed in the minutes of the previous, they weren't read; a motion to read next week's minutes, along with variations on that theme, were quashed by Our Fearless Leader, as soon as he could make himself heard. And there were no special orders of business, so we got right down to the real nitty-gritty -- tonight's Patron Saint, Mike Glyer, whom we awarded Three Cheers -- and a form 540, just for a change.

We had no business being here -- no, that's not right -- well, yes, I suppose it is; but what I meant was that there was no Official Business, Old or New, leaving us plenty of time for free-form silliness instead of the very slightly less informality of real business.

Christian announced that bids to run LosCon 25 would be accepted by the Directors at the February 9th Board meeting; the Board would probably then pass the buck back to the Society at the regular meeting on the 20th, when their chairpeople would give reasons to vote for them; and the voting will occur on the 27th. Be sure to attend -- there probably won't be many to vote against, but we might get lucky.

Bob Null had bad news -- Babylon 4 had been burgled of its tv and microwave oven. The Vice-President with the Sideburns said he'd been by the day before and had noticed B-4 was open -- he'd closed without looking in, such events having been quite rare till now. Bob suggested installing deadbolts on Babylon 4 and Deep Space 8.

Mike Stern announced that the following evening's installment of the Magic: The Slavering tournament would be version 1.5; be warned, those of you who know what the hell he was talking about.

CLJII said that the Video Projector Fund is approaching the required total, but does still need donations. He mentioned several units of currency; when he got to shekels, the puns came too thick and fast for me to record. (Hey, any excuse....) He also mentioned that this month's FWEMS will feature "caper babes", films such as Gambit, Modesty Blaise, and a couple of others. And he referred to a couple of exercises in improbability for which room cannot be spared here -- or at least had better not be. See him and find out another reason why the only thing probable about Charlie is his weekly presence.

Tim Merrigan announced the issuance of another number of De Profundis, our club organ; and by the way, Tim, thanks for making our official organ less of an official steam calliope than most such publications -- you know, a loud noise that's essentially just a lot of hot air. (And if I've contributed in the opposite direction with my minutes, I'm truly -- but not very -- sorry.) Oh yeah, the deadline for the next issue is 2/20.

Program Chairman Rick Foss announced coming programs. Tonight we'd see the film Sh! Octopus, a slim mystery fleshed out with old movie clichés performed by old pros who knew how to do them right -- fun, if hardly more intellectually stimulating than The Benny Hill Show. Nest week, Jeff Laube of Lockheed-Martin is to speak on the X-33 program. The 20th and 27th will see this country's second showing of Neil Gaimon's unusual British tv series Neverwhere. On March 6th, Eugene Volokh, former clerk for U.S. Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor, will talk on cyberspace law; even if you only download, some of this should be of serious interest. Amd on March 13th, Tom Safer will show more award-winning animated cartoons.

The Guy with the Sideburns usually has a brace of stories about on-line service users boasting nearly half the intelligence of gravel; this time it was about the programmer barely able to walk or chew gum -- encountering a program with a serious glitch, he modified it not quite correctly, so that thereafter each use made it worse. Lucy Stern may have topped that with the story of a customer who bought a quantity of material -- and shoplifted twice that amount. Oh she got away, but they had her number -- her credit card number!

Matthew Tepper informed us that the forthcoming Lost in Space film had cast William Hurt and Mimi Rogers as the Robinsons, having previously signed Gary Oldman as Dr. Smith. Many people, having seen the tv series, will hope to enjoy this -- some of the same ones who tell me I'm crazy.

Mike Stern had found a report of the British Naval Office reviewing the performance of an officer: "Somewhere there in an innocent village deprived of an idiot."

Mark Poliner hawked fliers for FilkCon and BucConeer.

Rick Foss quoted a report that a number of Arkansawyers had complained that their new license plate stickers read "86" instead of "98". Political jokes based on this datum will be left as an exercise for cheap-shot artists.

Hare Hobbs pointed out the numerous advantages of the type of backpack he was sporting as a convention survival kit.

Frank Waller mentioned that his father puts everything on his computer in triplicate. He didn't say if it was all entered three separate times or entered once and then copied. If it's the latter case. let us give sincere thanks he can't eneter Frank -- or, for that matter, most of the rest of us!

Registrar Selina Phanara had found three guests, not all of whom had yet managed to escape:

Laura Pyle of Glendale, California
Angela Jones of Blaine, Washington
Sandra Huibers of Vancouver, British Columbia.

Christian reviewed tonight's episode of Babylon 5, saying it was very good; he went into rather more detail than that, but not enough to spoil it for those of us who were recording it tonight to view it when we got home.

Charlie Jackson reviewed Love Rides the Rails; or, Will the Mail Train Run Tonight? starring our own Jim Hollander (and where has he been all these years?), with Bea Barrio as a dancehall girl and Ed Buchman as a railroad laborer. It's one of those Victorian Era melodramas intende to amuse the audience by the players' travesty of acting. Charlie recommended it highly.

Rick Foss reported that the restaurant in the middle of Los Angeles International Airport (I don't like to think of any airport as "LAX"!) has been refurbished and is now called "Encounters". The furnishings are out of The Jetsons cartoons, and the rest of the decor is pseudo-Out-Of-This-World; he called it delightfully silly. Oh, and the food's pretty good and over-priced but not outrageous.

Alex Pournelle had seen the New! Imroved! version of A New Hope (the actual name of the first Star WarsTM film, and was impressed by the changes, especially the new X-wing and Y-wing fighters. He was somewhat underwhelmed by the graininess of the original footage (which looked bad by comparison), the original computer graphics (now primitive-looking), and some unrepaired continuity glitches.

Mike Stern recommended Glen Cook's Deadly Quicksilver Lies, about an old, tough 1930's private eye. It's a fantasy -- our hero is "not quite on our earth".

Hare said that his uncle Bill Brooks, who had designed many cameras for space probes and shuttles, had been hospitalized with leukemia.

Eylat Eleasari announced that she and Mark will donate a 19" tv next week to replace the one stolen from Babylon 4; the gift was acknowledged with a brief but enthusiastic round of applause.

Christian pushed the new chairs.

One of Joe Zeff's colleagues had quit to take a job at JPL; a parting gift was a set of five pocket protectors -- one for every work day in the week.

Finally, at 9:20, Christian allowed Rob Cole to renew his motion to adjourn and then did The Honorable Thing.

Sesquipedalianly submitted,
Phil (Sorry I'm out of practice, folks) Castora, LASFS Surrogate Scribe  

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