Meeting #3122 Jun 12, 1997 PDF Print E-mail

 President: Christian McGuire
Scribe: Pie'd Typer Beth O'Brien

It was 8:10 p.m. on Thursday, June 12, 1997 when President Christian McGuire, missing his gavel and bracing himself for the madness to come, banged his sneaker on the front table and tried to call the 3,122nd meeting of the LASFS to order. Joe Zeff moved not to adjourn. That was a popular idea, so we continued with the meeting.

SPECIAL ORDERS OF BUSINESS: Charles Lee Jackson, II, announced the demise of the Emperor tonight because the prescription for his pain medication had not been renewed, and predicted the demise of the rest of him in the near future. So now Charles is officially a Royal Pain, but waiting with abated breath for the ultimate demise does not seem like a wise idea. Sneaking in a review in case tonights business left no time for it later, Matthew Tepper announced the release of a new CD by Tom Lehrer which contains the complete contents of his first two records in studio versions, four tracks which he did with an orchestra, and "I Got It From Agnes." Quoth Matthew: "It's good!."

Pie'd Typer Beth O'Brien read the MENACE of last week's meeting, which were approved as regurgitated. PATRON SAINT Sandy Cohen, the Sacred Chancellor of Chocolate, was with us tonight. He was given three pre-chocolatey cheers and never enough chocolate. Sandy then proceeded to try to make a speech. Ed Green admonished "Oh, shut up! Just give us the chocolate." Sandy speechified away anyway, talking about chaos theory. He then dumped a pile of assorted chocolates on the front table in an attempt to use fans to demonstrate the theory.

Everyone came up and grabbed, while Prez McGuire worked hard at abstaining.

Bill Rotsler was among us after a lengthy bout with cancer treatments. He related a recent incident when, answering an early morning knock on the door, he fainted and fell onto his retro-Hugo. "Wouldn't that make a great headline?" asked Bill. We all welcomed him back warmly. Ed Green then AUCTIONED a multi-meter with batteries.

The BUSINESS of the evening was ELECTIONS! Chairman of the Board Ed Green officiated over the lunacy. Matthew Tepper and Mike Stern were the official nominees for President, voted for on a green ballot card, and Matthew won handily. Congratulations to Mike! Joe Zeff was the only one crazy enough to allow himself to be nominated for Vice President so he ran unopposed, without a ballot needed. Mike Glyer bid $20.00 to select the color we would have used for the ballot if we had used one...and selected green as the color not to use. Liz Mortensen and Robbie Cantor were railroaded for Treasurer. Many were nominated for scribe, but none accepted. It was beginning to look bleak until Mike Glyer and the Pie'd Typer put their heads together, agreed to run as a tag team, and were railroaded. Now...if only I can con Mike into coming a cross dresser, we can bill ourselves as the Lady or the Typer. The office of Registrar was a livelier election, the candidates being Mike Stern, Charles Lee Jackson, II, Greg Bilan, and Frank Waller. Mike won after a neck and neck race with the dead again emperor.

Registrar Selina Phanara introduced GUEST Samantha Sheffield from Denton Texas, who learned of the LASFS from her father and her wicked stepmother. ANNOUNCEMENTS: CLJII announced the availability of the May issue of "Amazing Adventures," and Wesley Kawato announced that ABC is starting a new series in September called "Time Cop."

APPOINTIVE COMMITTEE REPORTS: Rick Foss announced that there are no changes in the programs he has previously announced. CLJII said that this week's magic number is 176. Bill Rotsler reported that he will be teaching a class on how to write science fiction at Learning Tree University in July and encouraged anyone interested to sign on.

FAANISH COMMITTEE REPORTS: Eylat Eleasari related an absolutely fascinating event that happened to her recently: she received a letter in French from an old man in France who just happens to be studying European and Jewish names and has her first name as his last name. Joe Zeff described why he thinks Earthlink's new Gold Member program proves that P.T. Barnum was right. Mark Poliner described the tagger who fell from the freeway overpass as evolution in action.

MISCELLANEOUS: CLJII reminded people about FWEMS. This month there will be cake and goodies in honor of the tenth anniversary of his last birthday. Fred Patten announced that the first published results of tonight's election are available in APA-L. Mike Stern took us home with the results of last week's Magic tournament - the winner was Bruce Poehlman, and Darnell Coleman is still in the lead for the year. We called it quits and ADJOURNed at 9:20 p.m.

Respectfully submitted,
Pie'd Typer Beth O'Brien  

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